2 for 1 Special; Pregnant again!

Part 1-

It’s been a few a months now, I am back at the gym, eagerly working on conceiving while still recovering from miscarriage number 1.  This time I want to continue to be responsible and schedule a medical appointment with a new OBGYN.  I did not have a good experience with my last provider and it was far from personable.  I am still searching to find out why I miscarried, was it my fault?  Did I work too much and that’s why the baby left me?  People and providers are telling me these things happen and it could be that pregnancy was not viable which was why my body rejected the baby in a spontaneous abortion.  Just so you know, I never heard of the term spontaneous abortion until I miscarried.  I was under the impression that an abortion was something people got to get rid of their pregnancy.  According to medicinenet.com, a spontaneous abortion is when someone is miscarrying before 20 weeks where a fetus is unable to survive outside the womb or is not viable pregnancy.    I have been very hard on myself and went back to being healthier to have a better pregnancy and eating recommended foods and pre-natals to prepare for the next pregnancy journey.

It’s May 2017, 7 months have passed.  I am getting pregnancy symptoms and my period is a week late.  I take a pregnancy test, whoohoo, I am pregnant!  Yay, super excited, hope things will go better this time around.  Wow, I’m pregnant before my doctors appointment with a new OBGYN, I love how life and planning goals work together.  I estimate I should be 5 weeks pregnant, still spotting and started getting very bad cramps.  I take another at home pregnancy test, it confirms my pregnancy, however I started getting stronger cramps and heavy bleeding.  I guess I’m losing this pregnancy and a bled on and off for about 3 weeks.  I was able to follow up with my OBGYN, which was scheduled for Mid June 2017, she confirms the pregnancy hormones are out of my body.  I ask her what is causing my miscarriages?  The doctor is unable to give me a definite answer except it could be the pregnancy is not viable due to possible chromosome abnormalities and when your body does not have a viable pregnancy, the body gets rid of the pregnancy.

Alright, I’m handling this better.  This was way different than losing my first pregnancy.  I know what pain is and nothing is like losing the first miscarriage.  Whatever, I’m fine.

Part 2 A few weeks later…

I’m fine to get back into regular routine.  I have a brand new job with the same agency that I was working with, except this job is much easier on my body.  I will not have to travel and do excessive walking all over the place.  Most importantly, the best part of this position is that I will be working with youth in the juvenile justice system.  I love children.  I can’t help but wonder how blessed I am that the Lord is able to provide me with good positions, thank you Lord, but what good is this money when I’m missing a baby to share my love, joy, and finances with?  The new job is everything I wanted and then some.

For some reason, I am feeling under the weather, I mean it is July of 2017 and there have been some warm days.  I have been spotting and feeling a little feverish.  I’m going to check it by going to  urgent care just to be safe.  I know my period can be a little off due to the miscarriage from May 2017, maybe that’s causing the spotting even though I’ve been spotting for 3 weeks.

As I go to urgent care, the CityMD near my home, I provide the doctors with my medical history.  I told them I decided to come in because I have been spotting, let them know my miscarriage history, and feeling feverish.  They took a urine test, I assure I am not pregnant since pretty much I had a miscarriage from May 2017 and followed up with an OBGYN to clear there are no more HCG which was done mid June, 2017.  The doctor finally decided to come to me, guess what!  I’m pregnant, again!  How and when did this happen?  I am bleeding a lot, will this pregnancy be viable?  The urgent care recommends I follow up with my OBGYN and/or come back to them for follow up blood work to monitor the HCG levels.

I am shocked and in disbelief.  How does a person get pregnant so fast?  Is this even possible?  Well it is possible,  I am officially pregnant making it 3 pregnancies.  My HCG levels have been going up and down.   From my OBGYN, I was recommended to see a fertility specialist.  At this moment, I would qualify for a referral since I have been trying to conceive for a year and have had multiple miscarriages.  This is also before my 29th birthday, at this point, birthdays are overrated.

I went to my new fertility specialist, he continued to monitor my blood work.  Basically, he feels this pregnancy is not viable due to the HCG levels not multiplying the way they should.  He advised me to do a dilation and curettage (also known as a d&C), this is a procedure to take the fetus out.  My fertility specialist recommended this procedure in hopes of gathering any genetic material to be tested so that we can know whether there is a genetic issue or if it was my body refusing to take the pregnancy.  I struggled with doing this procedure, I did not want to risk or do anything to take my baby away from me.  I felt I was in a hard place, the doctor also let me know that if the baby is not cleaned out properly, there is a high risk for infections.  I was prescribed medications to take vaginally to prepare my body for the procedure.

I remember calling my close friends and my sister in law to help me make a decision.  Do I take the chance to see where this pregnancy goes or do I go for the procedure?  We still didn’t find a fetal heart beat.  My fertility specialist called me the night before the procedure and told me my blood work continues to look abnormal for a viable pregnancy, the HCG are yes increasing, but not at the level for a healthy pregnancy.  After doing much thinking, consulting with Hubby, and close friends I decide to go for the procedure.   My birthday is on July 23, I was scheduled for my D&C on July 29, 2017.  I was under partial anesthesia, I remember tearing before the procedure and  crying after the procedure.

I have to remind you I am at a fertility clinic, before the procedure I was waiting in an operation room with other excited women waiting for implantation and hoping for a viable pregnancy.  I remember thinking my situation is the opposite, I am pregnant and now I’m going to have to take it out.   I almost didn’t want to talk to the other women, my procedure is nothing like theirs, except we all have a common desire which was a beautiful child to hold, love, and cherish.